How To Not Hate This New Year
A consolation from philosophy.
New Year is like that new acquaintance whom you seem to have had the unusual, romantic connection with . They’re Homo-sapien too; you’ll find out getting closer.
Like a eulogy, we only talk about the good side of people when they are no more. Even when we talk about their bad side, we reminiscent in a romantic way as if to say, “look, they too had their few quirks.”
This New Year, are you going to go crazy about maximizing your productivity, getting in shape, building healthy relationships, starting a new business, being more spiritual or eating healthily — as you do always and end up repeating old habits?
It’s good to have resolutions; you sure have to get one of those.
But while making those resolutions, don’t forget you’re human — with feelings — and not a bloodless machine that follows a strict code to operate.
You’ll probably get into the loop of old habits, and lose out the energy to be productive. The year will soon be like the previous ones — stale, stressful and exhaustive. And you’ll probably crave for a new one, like you do each year.
“Humans live for about 80 years, and they spend most of it waiting for things to end” — Janet, The Good Place.
Our Craving For a Fresh Start
On the average, this is the logic our lives follow:
Not enjoying a relationship? Move to a new one. Having troubles doing something? Quit. Work not fun? Change careers.
We move from one trouble to another in search of a “better” experience. But what are we really in search for? A fresh start!
There is this joy and feeling of freshness one gets when starting something new, be it moving to a new place, getting a new partner, a job, or starting a new year. The list can go on (and on).
This is the fresh-start effect. We all crave for it.
But when used constructively, one can harness their creative potential and regain the power to innovate. It gives us a sense of control — that we too, can create something great out of the mess the previous years/experience have brought.
This is exactly what approaching a new year does to our minds: It gives us a sense of a new beginning. We then confide in resolutions as some sort of a reset button.
Utilise the fresh-start effect.
This new year.
Count every day as a new beginning. You don’t have to wait 365 or so days to start all over again. But see every moment as life’s second chance for you to make things better than they were. It’s a lot more refreshing living that way!
Know that, there’s no utopia anywhere.
Before you quit on something or someone, take a sabbatical period off from whatever that is draining you and begin again revitalized.
Wabi Sabi
The Beauty of Imperfection .
The glamour of the season when flowers wither and lifeless, browny leaves scatter under trees. The awakening feeling of breathing in the rain. These are simple, imperfect moments of nature, yet the most beautiful ones we stumble upon.
Wabi Sabi is a Japanese idea of finding peace in imperfection; and seeing beauty in the simple, incomplete and rustic. It teaches us to take a second look at the things around us, the unfolding misery and staleness, and find beauty in them.
There’s beauty in everything.
Routine can make us lose the joy of everyday life. Our mind reduces the weight of having to repeat the same thing by creating reflexes. We then use little energy in doing the things we do.
While this helps us make complex tasks easier, it makes our life a little stale. We then crave for the fresh-start effect; wanting something new.
Consolation in Impermanence
Nothing lasts forever. At least that’s the little I’ve learned these few decades on earth. People and Systems will change. That’s the curse of time. But wabi-sabi teaches that impermanence is two-edged — can be both good and bad — and that we need to find consolation in change.
This New Year —
Let wabi-sabi be your philosophy.
Appreciate the little things, those that have lost meaning and reconnect to them.
Times are hard when things have got no meaning — Oasis, stand by me.
Know that your life is happening in bits and dots, and these dots are in and of themselves, meaningless. But — someway, somehow — they are connecting to create something meaningful.
“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.”- Steve Jobs.
Life’s not perfect. That’s the beauty of living. Before you give up, look back for a second time and break all the prejudices that blinded your view. That is when the true beauty of things unfold.
Happy New Year! Resolve to be useful, that’s the purpose of life.